The Flea: Persuasive Speech

A modern take on John Donne’s ‘The Flea’; hope it’s intense.


I want you to take note of this flea. Now you’ve recognised it, is it not something so minuscule? Insignificant to you and I? It bit me first, now it has bitten you, thus a part of both of us is in this creature. You cannot be accused for sinning, they cannot bask you in shame nor will you have lost your virtue. I will constantly remind you of its trivial consequences, yet it seems as if I am making myself a fool for I court you and you have been more intimate with a pest.

Do not kill the flea. Spare its life, my life and yours as it has unified us by blood – our entity is now bound together. We are almost married—no, even more so. This flea is our marriage bed and marriage temple entwined into one, therefore not even the animosity of our parents (and sometimes your own agnosticism) will be able to defy this link in the living walls of the flea. Albeit you are tired of my ways – so much so you want to kill me – but not only will you be condemned for murder, you’ll be committing suicide and sacrilege hence ultimately committing three of the most unforgivable sins.

How cruel of you to terminate a life just to prove me wrong. Considering I underestimate your capabilities, I must ask if you have slayed another innocent life or possibly something worse. What did the flea do? All it did was follow the course of its nature. It’s amusing as here you are now, proud and relieved to be retaining your level of prestige and learning how false your fears were. Since your nobleness was left unharmed, you will lose no more honour yielding to me than you did killing a flea.

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